From: firstname.lastname@example.org (John W. Hazelton)
Subject: Original Saturday Night Live Beatles Offer
Date: 14 Aug 1995 08:55:34 -0700
Since this comes up periodically, I thought I'd post the text of
Lorne Michaels' original on air offer to the Beatles to get back
together on the show
April 24, 1976
(OPEN ON: LORNE AT DESK. THERE IS ONLY ONE CAMERA USED THROUGHOUT)
Hi. I'm Lorne Michaels, the producer of "Saturday Night."
Right now, we're being seen by approximately twenty-two million
viewers, but please allow me, if I may, to address myself to just
four very special people -- John, Paul, George and Ringo -- the
Beatles. Lately, there have been a lot of rumors to the effect
that the four of you might be getting back together. That would
be great. In my book, the Beatles are the best thing that ever
happened to music. It goes even deeper than that. You're not
just a musical group, you're a part of us. We grew up with you.
It's for this reason that I'm inviting you to come on our show.
Now, we've heard and read a lot about personality and legal
conflicts that might prevent you guys from reuniting. That's
something which is none of my business. That's a personal problem.
You guys will have to handle that. But it's also been said
that no one as yet has come up with enough money to satisfy you.
Well, If it's money you want, there's no problem here. The
National Broadcasting Company has authorized me to offer you
this check to be on our show. (HOLDS UP CHECK) A certified
check for $3,000. Here it is, right here. Dave -- can we get
a close-up on this? Which camera? Oh, this one. (CAMERA
MOVES IN TO SHOW CHECK) Here it is, a check made out to
you, the Beatles, for $3,000. All you have to do is sing
three Beatle songs.
_She loves you_
_Yeah, yeah, yeah ..._
That's $1,000 right there. You know the words. It'll be easy.
Like I said, this is made out to the Beatles -- you divide it
up any way you want. If you want to give Ringo less, it's up
to you. I'd rather not get involved. I'm sincere about this.
If it helps you to reach a decision to reunite, it's well worth
the investment. You have agents. You know where _I_ can be
reached. Just think about it, okay? (HOLDS UP CHECK AGAIN)
Date: Mon, 20 Jan 1997 00:27:27 -0500 (EST)
Subject: SNL Offer
Lorne Micheals made a second offer to the Fabs:
This was aired on May 22, 1976. The host was Buck Henry, and Musical guest
was Gordon Lightfoot.
Lorne: Hi, I'm Lorne Micheals, producer of Saturday Night. A short while ago
I went on the air and addressed myself to John, Paul, George, and Ringo--the
Beatles. At that time I invited them to come on our show, and told them that
I was authorized by NBC to pay them in the sum of three thousand dollars for
just three songs. Well, about a month has gone by. We've heard from the
Monkees, Freddy and the Dreamers, Peter and Gordon, Herman's Hermits, the
Cowsills, and Lulu; but still no word from the Beatles. I'm not discouraged
and neither is NBC. Because of the recent acclaim we've recieved, I have the
wieght to go to the network and convince them that it is worth it for them to
sweeten the pot. John, Paul, George, and Ringo--NBC is now prepared to up
the original offer from three thousand, to three thousand, two hundred. Can
we get a close-up of the check? Which camera is it? As you can see, it's a
check made out to you, The Beatles. Off the record, this increase comes to
an extra fifty dollars for each of you. That's if you split it equally--I'm
still not sure what your situation with Ringo is. Also, NBC has decided that
they will take care of your hotel accomodations. Don Pardo, tell the Beatles
what they can expect when they come to get that check for three thousand, two
Don Pardo: It'll be my pleasure, Lorne. First of all, the lads from
Liverpool will be picked up by a radio-dispatched Checker cab that will whisk
them to the Cross Town Motor Inn, located in the heart of New York's
fashionable garment district. Once there, they will check in in the recently
renovated lobby; and then it's off to their rooms via round-the-clock
elevator service. They'll be treated like royalty as pitchers of ice water
are hand-delivered to their rooms, and they can drink that water from glasses
sanitized for their convinience. Oops--Ringo spilled a little something on
his jacket? No problem--not with prompt forty-eight-hour dry cleaning
service! "In by Tuesday, out by Thursday." And let's just put a shine on
those shoes, too, with a free shoe shine cloth. And, Lorne, since the
Beatles will be staying in seperate rooms, the four Mop Tops can speak to
each other as much as they want because there is no charge for room-to-room
calls. And, after a hard day's night, the Beatles can sleep as late as they
like with a leisurely checkout time of 10 A.M. That's the Cross Town Motor
Inn, a hotel tradition, hosting New York's visitors since 1971. Yeah, yeah,
yeah! Back to you Lorne!
Lorne: Thank you, Don Pardo. John, Paul, George, and Ringo, that's where we
stand right now. Thirty-two hundred dollars, and free hotel accomodations.
Now, it's your move. I've always respected you, and you were always my
favorite group, and I always liked Yoko, even at the beginning when everyone
was having problems with her. I would like to see you do our show, and so
would the American people. You know where i can be reached. I'm waiting to
hear from you.